That Was Then
by loiire
Summary: It’s too hard to sit here and know that these memories are all I have left of the person I love."


**Disclaimer: **I am in no way shape or form Stephenie Meyer. Therefore, I do not own _Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse_ or_ Breaking Dawn_. In addition, I do not own any of the characters.

**A/N:** Just a little introduction fic. Not too sure where I'm going with this account. Just wanted to get something out there. Hopefully get some help with my writing as well.

**About: ** This is a 'What-If' fanficiton. Takes place in _New Moon_ after Edward leaves, excluding the rest of the book and series.

**Summary:** None really

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**[[Bella's POV]]**

In the past few years, my life has taken a dramatic change. My likes, dislike, habits' and how I see everyone around me. I used to see every one, except Edward Cullen, as just another person, but now that's how I see everyone. No exception made, not anymore. I also, like any girl, used to think about how my future would go. Now all my future holds for me is disappointment. Such a different reality than my childhood dreams and the false hopes he'd promised me.

Everything was fine, until you left town. You told me I wasn't good for you. That you wouldn't come back. You left. And you were gone for two whole years. I would know. The town was quiet and lonely without you, but soon everyone accepted the fact that you were gone and that was that. Moreover, no one talked about and it seemed as if you never lived here. Then one day you just appeared back in town acting as if nothing had happened, that your leave wasn't real. At first everyone was shocked but in time everyone grew to accept your return and they were happy again. Then you started acting different. Before you left I remember how you would push anyone else's affection but mine away, and even then, we didn't share much. Now it's like your craving for the attention you hated and despised for so long. Now you want girls to date you and kiss you and love you.

I used to want things to be just as they are now, to a certain extent of course. I mean I wanted us to kiss and date and make a public affair of it all, but now watching you just disgusts me. The person you've become is horribly revolting. You're so… pointless it seems. For that very reason I avoid you and I avoid your catcalls and sweet words; I know there all lies. When you enter a room, I immediately exit. Keeping away from you and what you've become is so routine now.

But what irks me the most about the new you is the fact that I fell in love with the old you.

Sighing I lift my gaze from the plate before me and to you and your most recent hookup. She's blonde, perky and has tits bigger than my head. My stomach churns as you sit there so close together. How it looks as if you're trying to eat her face, your hands touching her in ways that should be exclusive to the bedroom alone. With a groan, I swiftly get up from my seat and leave. How sick and disgusting.

I need to go somewhere that I know you'll never be able to find me. My mind was in a rush and before I knew what was happening I find myself walking through the dense forest, emerging into an all too familiar empty field. I fall to my knees and run my hands over the slightly damp grass. Suddenly a wave of memories floods my mind. The talks we'd shared here, the way you could sparkle and not give a damn. Tears begin to gather in the corners of my eyes and with a loud huff I grab and pulled handfuls of grass from the ground, throwing them before me. It's too hard to sit here and know that these memories are all I have left of the person I love.

Pushing myself up I begin my journey back home, or at least back into town. Being a Saturday, the streets were tad more crowded than normal but Forks is a small town and getting from place to place, even in a crowd is easy. As I pass the people by, earning a few morning greetings and sweet smiles, I find myself climbing the small paved hill to the High School. How many years have been wasted in these walls I will never know.

The front door was unlocked, Saturday detention having let out only an hour ago. The lights were off and a few janitors passed the halls waxing the floors. Silently I dipped down the halls looking for the room and after a few minutes of searching, I pushed back the door and walked in. Biology Two. How it has changed in the last few years. Once filled with noise and color, this room now has nothing but the desks' and a collection of extra textbooks. I slowly walk over to my seat and sit down. At first, I hadn't wanted to sit here, that changed over time. Today however, was just like day one. I didn't know why I was sitting here, but I couldn't help it.

I looked to my left, the empty seat you once sat. Just like the field, memories rushed back, great, just great. It was as if I couldn't escape you. Crossing my arms on the table and dropping my head to them I sighed, my warm breath coming back at me. I don't know how long I sat there, the clock had stopped ticking back my senior year and obviously, no-one had taken the time to fix it. That didn't matter though. I'd sit here all day if it meant not having to see you.

"It's nice day today, isn't it." A sweet voice said from behind.

I groaned, not bothering to lift my head.

"What's the matter Bella? Something is bothering you. I can tell. I know you. Not as well as I'd like," a small laugh accompanied the sound of footsteps, "But well enough I'd like to think." His cold hand fell on my back, rubbing me lightly.

With a roll of the shoulders, I got up, coming face to face with his amber eyes. "It's you Edward. How you've become so… perverted. I just can't stand it anymore."

You hand moves from my back to my face, resting on my cheek. "Is that how you feel? You hate me now. Is that what you're saying?"

I pull away and nod. Your lips move, and I know you're asking me something but I've already made up my mind. With a sharp intake, I turn and make a beeline for the door. My hand gripped the handle and I heard him call out to me, stopping me dead in my tracks.

"Let's start over? I know you want me." Before I know it, you're behind me, your whispers filling my ears. I feel your hands run over my hair, twirling some strands of hair on your long fingers. I tense up and I know for a fact you felt it. I know you feel everything I do. You always did. "Bella what are you doing. I know how much you love me. And I love you, you're my whole world. There are no more secrets, no more worries. Why can't we just be happy? Do you love someone else?"

Silence. Complete and utter silence.

"I do love someone else. I love the old you."

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**A/N**: First fanfiction ;; detailed constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated and dually noted. Personally, I really hate it, the concept I think was… average and the writing just fails. I did something similar to this years ago and I just re-vamped for this pairing.


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